TIPS FOR CONNECTING WITH NEW PEOPLE

Meeting new people is not really an art but a matter of developing a set of skills that

enables you to open conversations. Once you learn a few techniques you will be able to

use them in daily life as well as in seeking employment.

Remember: Most people like to talk about themselves. You need to use a line of

questioning that permits them to do so. Some examples:

* "Looks like a warm coat. Where did you get that?"

* If at a meeting or cafe/coffee shop: "I'm new here. What is the best coffee or best

item on the menu?" OR "How long has this cafe been here?"

FINDING GREETINGS THAT MAKE YOU COMFORTABLE

It is important to find greetings or openers that you are comfortbale with. Folowing are

some examples that most of us can use:

* Weather topics – "Well, you ordered some more snow." OR "Are we going to get more of

the same tomorrow?" OR "I have only been here a few months or years. Is this typical

for this time of year?" OR if you are a skier: "This is your kind of weather."

BE CURIOUS: Think about who this person is and what would you like to know about

them? Listen, and if they say something interesting ask them to elaborate. Perhaps

you have been a party to a conversation you hear while waiting for a cup of coffee.

You can pick up on it by saying: "I heard you mention ___________. Sounds

interesting." "Tell me more" or any question that gives them a chance to elaborate.

THINK: What openers have you usually used that you are comfortable with when

meeting others.

LISTEN: What do you hear others saying that you could be comfortable using?

USING CURRENT TOPICS AS OPENERS:

* The weather – "Hot enough or cold enough for you? Nice weather, just ruined my golf

day. Do you golf? Skiers should be happy today. Do you ski?" OR "Well, you ordered

some more hot weather didn't you?"

* National or world events that are in the paper or on the news. Be careful with these

however as you can alienate some people.

I use some openers with inidviduals that are different. Most people say:"How are you

doing today?" The answer is usually: "Fine." If you have a humorous side. you

might try a reply of: "Well, yes." OR "Mostly" OR "Somewhat." This will usually bring a

response of: "What does that mean?" A reply can be: " My glass is half full."

Another one I sometimes use with a small group is: "I don't remember why I called this

Meeting, do you?"

"Sunny to partly sunny" is another response I sometimes use. I go on to state: "My

weatherman gives me that line all the time." OR "My glass is half full today."

OR "Cloudy to partly cloudy. My weatherlady gives me that line all the time."

OR "Things couldn't be better unless I was two, and nobody is going to clone me."

A few different lines that may spark a conversation. At the least, an explanation of what

you mean.

NOT EVERYONE IS COMFORTABLE WITH OFF THE WALL OR VERY DIFFERENT

STATEMENTS FROM THE NORMAL: "I am fine." response. Much depends on your sense of

humor and HOW YOU SAY IT.

ALSO: Sometimes if you want to solicit information, there is no betteer way to approach a

person than to INTRODUCE YOURSELF AND ASK FOR THE INFOMRATION YOU WANT.

WATCH CAREFULLY HOW OTHERS GREET PEOPLE AND PERHAPS YOU WILL PICK UP

SOME LINES THAT YOU ARE COMFORTABLE WITH.